This Can't be Happening

An Open Letter to Chris Cornell:

Now, Chris, I have admired you since my teen years.  When you led Soundgarden in the best era for music, your voice and your lyrics floated through the air, each note hanging to oxygen molecules.  "Outshined" provided me the insight and validation that led me through some rough times in college.  "Slaves and Bulldogs" guided me to build an emotional foundation for surviving moments of difficulty with boyfriends, friends, etc.  Moving on to Superunknown, you and the gentlemen from Soundgarden gave us anthems, like the epic "Black Hole Sun", and the tribute to "Spoonman".  With Down on the Upside being the final chapter in the Soundgarden story, you gave us the classic ballad of despair, "Blow up the Outside World". My personal favorite, "Burden in my Hand", provides a blues-rock fusion with a story of eliminating one's lover.   You gave us Euphoria Morning, which highlighted your songwriting and your musical range.  Oh, and "Seasons", from the Singles soundtrack--that is my favorite song and it has been on repeat a lot lately, as many of your songs are. Lest we forget, the genius of Temple of the Dog. . .

Moving on to the next era of your career with Audioslave, the supergroup with members of Rage Against the Machine, which was the mastermind of Rick Rubin.  "Like a Stone" told the story of the spiritual aspirant, with lyrics and melodies mirroring U2's The Joshua Tree.  The remaining two albums were also excellent, with the musical mosh of RATM and you.  You all were the first American band to play in Cuba, to adoring fans.  I had the opportunity to see you perform in Houston.  It was amazing, and I didn't sit down the whole time.  I felt a sense of disappointment when I heard that you left the band, but, I know that you are a talented musician, singer, and songwriter.  I purchased Carry On, and I must say, I was shocked.  Although it wasn't bad, and I really liked the cover of "Billie Jean", the album reminded me a little of, well, John Mayer.  I didn't hear the Chris Cornell that I have known and loyally loved for so long.  But, it was okay, just an experiment.  

I have been hearing of this collaboration with Timbaland for some time now, and I didn't want to believe it.  There is a place for Timbaland and Justin Timberlake, as they make some catchy pop songs together.  However, their place is on a secret playlist, buried in the vault of my iPod, where noone knows where it is.  They emerge when I run on the treadmill or use the elliptical trainer.  However, their place is not in a recording studio with you.  You are an icon in music, and you, along with many others, led a generation (known as X) through some confusing, dark, and frustrating times in our lives.  I completely understand the tradition of risk-taking and going outside one's comfort zone, so I wanted to give it a try.  I wanted to keep an open mind.  But, I am sorry, it was one of the most difficult things to hear.  I was hearing one of my favorite singers amazing vocal talent completely maimed by overproduced, synthesized beats, with the repetitive catch phrases.  If I remember correctly, the chorus of the first song was ,"This b---h ain't a part of me", and I felt like I was in some Twilight Zone, because you are a soulful singer, uttering the lyrics of some Lil Wayne-wannabe.  

I guess what I'm trying to say, is that you are better than this.  You don't have to sell out, so that my teenage cousins will download the Timbaland-produced catchy pop tunes off iTunes.  We love you, your voice, your music, your lyrics, etc.  You don't have to share a stage with the Pussycat Dolls.  You don't have to have Justin Timberlake sing background vocals.  You definitely don't need the hiccough-like grunt of Timbaland to ruin a song for you.  Please, play the music we all know and love from you.

Songs on Repeat

Today, U2 drops their new album, No Line in the Horizon, and will hopefully sell more copies than Taylor Swift, Fall Out Boy, etc. combined.  Five star reviews and a week-long promotional appearance on Letterman will hopefully lead to . . .gasp. . . a tour. . .  But, in the tradition of the catchy iTunes-commercial song, I have had to download and keep "Get on Your Boots" on repeat for the last few days.  It starts my day, helps me keep my pace on the treadmill, etc.  The song actually inspired me to wear "sexy boots" to work.

Now, for the embarrassing part.  I am totally addicted to this dumb song, "Burning Up", by, yes, the Jonas Brothers.  I finally had to download it, after I watched them perform it (I was with my younger, teenage cousins).  I love all two minutes and 57 seconds of this song.  As a woman, I want nothing more than for some guy, to sing in that whiny, lovesick voice that I make him "burn up" for me.  I don't know their names, and frankly, they are not the best singers.  However, this is really a great pop song, with a sweet innocence reminiscent of the early Beatles or Elvis Presley songs.  

Songs in My Head

After getting out of a meeting early last week, I had this brilliant idea of going running.  I changed my clothes in the hospital, listened to a woman speak to her excrement so it would mobilize better, and went to a local 3-mile track. As I arrived and completed my stretches, I had the revelation that I had forgotten my favorite running partner: my iPod.  After a long utterance of explicatives, I decided to run any way.  Unfortunately , the last song I had heard at the time was this song about "I'm so addicted to. . .the way you go down on me between the sheets", etc.  I believe the song title is "Addicted", by a group called Saving Abel.  Now, who the hell authorizes this crap to be played on the radio.  Of course, I listen to it intently, out of pure shock and dismay, thanks to the chorus consisting of being addicted to the way some chick "goes down" on him "between the sheets".  So, as I am running in the lovely fallish winter weather, this dude in the song continues to whine about getting oral sex and not feeling complete.  Then, "Addicted" fuses with "Lollipop", to form a very disturbing song.  Now, I realize that everyone loves "Lollipop".  It has one of those catchy, repetitive, almost hypnotizing beats with the catch phrase that is pervasive through out the track.  I could only make it six miles, because I am way too codependent on my iPod, the arm strap, and my clip-on headphones.  

The song that gets in my head the most, and eventually was downloaded onto my iPod was "Hot and Cold" by that chick who first kissed a girl.  I hate to admit, this is a catchy, fun track and I think I kind of like it.  I find myself singing along to it in the car and repeating it a few times.  Metro Station's "Shake It" has the same effect on me.  I heard that Miley Cyrus's half-brother is in this particular group.  Again, these tracks have that infectious, repetitive beat with some catch phrases like "Let's Drop" and "We fight, we break up, we kiss, we make up".  Obviously, there is no true musical talent involved, and looks may be an advantage in some opinions, but, not necessarily mine.  But, on a karaoke excursion, I just might be singing the line, "You PMS, like a bitch I would know".